Grace

3 posts

Aging Poem

The recent workshop I led on “Aging as a Spiritual Practice” was so delightful. The shared wisdom in the group reverberated. I realized how very much I love sharing time with elders who are invested in growing in self-understanding – and to do this as a group was delicious.

I wrote a poem, on the back of a slip of paper – sort of a tongue-in-cheek bit of humor. A couple of folks asked me for a copy of it afterward — so I’ll share it with you, too. Perhaps you’ll enjoy the humor — and understand! – also.

Coming together –
all the loose shards of my life.
What to call this?
“Retirement” hardly
     seems to qualify.
 
Although I do seem to be
     tired, a lot.
 
Memories, in part,
   the fragments of my mind
drifting through hazy, lazy days
    in a sometimes frenzy.
 
Wanderings, a fair bit,
      the mind wondering what –
if anything – might motivate me
      to put in time
- and energy – to “step up to the plate,”
“volunteer,” “pay back” (whatever
does that even mean?)
 
I do seem to be
     tired, a lot.
 
Curious, still,
   what the day and days
will hold.
   Grateful, often
for deeper and deepening
   relations.
 
With those I’ve known
and are still meeting.
   Awestruck at
the way the changing
light of the seasons
   glint off the old log pile
in the back.
 
That can’t be new –
    yet –
to me, it is.
 
  What is left, then –
without the alarm
propelling me into the
busy days of
   clinic-life?
 
“Re-tired”
     OK,
  Well.
Let’s just see
where these new
treads will go.
 
   

Taking Care of Ourselves

We often have the idea that in order to take care of ourselves we need something special – out of the ordinary. Something big enough to stand out.

But that idea can set us up for frustration if we are not able to get away. It is when we learn to appreciate the small things – the sunrise (and really – isn’t that huge? Every. Single. Day.), a bird’s sudden first chirp in the fresh, crisp spring morning, the cat curling up with sudden onset purring next to us – that we have a chance for ongoing nourishment through the course of our days. Often what goes missing is gratitude.  What makes the difference between a good day and bad one is the rise of irritation vs gratitude for the impact of things that occur to us.

 Sometimes there are unforeseen difficult events that grab our focus for extended periods of time. We feel like we are stuck in survival mode. Like a sudden health emergency with ripple challenges. These things happen no matter how careful we are or how “perfectly” we conduct our lives. Especially during these times, having nurtured a capacity for noticing and appreciating the “small things” in our lives can get us through.

This doesn’t mean never go on retreat. It just means don’t depend on that as the only way to nourish yourself. Try this experiment: each time you notice a rise of irritation today, counter it with what you can authentically feel grateful for in that moment. See how that shifts your internal sense of the moment with such minimal effort.

Nourishment often really is best served up in small bites.

Forgiveness

Forgiveness.  We know it matters, but golly it can be hard to do. Most religious traditions focus on forgiveness as an essential part of the spiritual path, but it matters for our personal health, too.  Beyond the obvious discomfort we experience from an inner roiling diatribe, it is literally hard on the heart.  “Held-in hostility” has been linked to heart attacks, and difficulty healing if we have one.

The challenge, of course, is that though we may be willing to forgive, we can’t will it to happen.  There are things that can help: realizing we are only hurting ourselves can help shift the inner tide. Turning the whole mess over to a Higher Power to deal with justly (and letting go of our idea of what justice should be) helps.  Finding ways in our own lives we have been less than perfect along similar lines as the offender is a good thought process.

I created a CD with a guided imagery to help this process. In the name of contributing to a positive spin in the world right now, I am giving these away free of charge. (I do ask, please for postage).  If you or someone you know could benefit from this, please do take one – and pass it on.

I am sincerely hoping this may contribute to good.  And chime in on the comments if you have added thoughts, suggestions, helpful advice for us all.