Emotional Health

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From the Diary of a Doctor

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Many patients tell me they awaken at 3 in the morning and can’t get back to sleep. Most want a sleeping pill to help silence the incessant yammer of voices that plague those early morning restless hours.

I’m familiar with these morning hours and their demons. With the conscious constant stream of busy thoughts subdued in sleep, the deeper subconscious set gets into action, rising to the surface as dreams or yammer. When the cacophony gets loud enough to wake us up… there we are, alone with the racket. It can be daunting.

Mystical religions and traditions through the ages have used the 4 AM marker as the time to awaken to begin prayer with the tacit understanding that it is a most powerful time to focus on subduing the voices that injure us. The lies, misunderstandings, negative warps we have in life that have been sublimated because they don’t fit the image we want of ourselves in the world come to surface then.

This makes this prime time for change, too. Self-reflection then can feel like looking at ourselves through a shattered hall of mirrors, but it is a rich time for release of what no longer serves us if we but use the tool at hand for this purpose. Most of us canter through our days at such a frenzied pace that we keep these shadows lurking far enough back in the closet they don’t detract from our pace. But lurk they do, and when the early AM hours dredge them up for review we honestly have an opportunity staring us in the face.

So what to do? First know it for what it is. Just because the cacophony is loud does not make it true. Honest self-reflection does not mean to believe all you hear bouncing around in there at that dread time of night, What it does reflect are the hidden crevices of anxiety, dread and fears that we harbor. Good to know this.

If you have a tradition of prayer or relation with Divine this is helpful. If not, use the notion of “Truth”. Invite this in. This means do nothing. Stand still. Don’t fight. But don’t believe the storm of noise, either. In the midst of the racket, invite Divine Light – the Truth in. That’s it.

The flies in the face of all or most of our training – to engage with the fury of a warrior and fix it. Do something. In this case, that increases the stress because we’d be shadowboxing with our own delusions to start with. Instead breathe deep, and invite re-orientation with the Truth (and this is hard) – not really knowing for sure what that is. Of course not. That’s the original problem in this part of our murky minds. We got confused on one part or another way back when and infinite stories get conjured up along these fault lines in perpetuity. So – give it up.

This is the opportunity in these early AM hours when we awaken in the midst of self-generated misery. Stop fighting it. Don’t ignore it. FEAD [https://maryanniyer.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/09/FEAD-It-Differently.pdf] – Face, Embrace, Allow space, invite Divine grace.

By normal AM waking hours, you will find yourself re-oriented – with a big chunk of historical confusion cleared from your psyche. If you do this, it truly speeds up the process enormously. You will be re-oriented to a much better day.

Aging as a Spiritual Practice

Aging as Spiritual Practice, Divine Grace emotional health gratitude Kindness possibilites Serenity spirituality True Self

I am teaching a 3 week workshop on Aging as a Spiritual Practice at the Center for Spiritual Wisdom in Brevard.  We have an amazing group of elders who are so wise and engaged in this process, I am truly humbled and in awe. I think some of you who are readers of my blog would appreciate the information from our last class.

The invitation in the second class was to review our place in the context of our lineage by entering deeply into the awareness of our mother (for the women)/father (for the men).  Imagine living their lives – in their times – under their circumstances.  Then zoom up to a birdseye view to observe the patterns of the lineage into which you were born.  See how you fit into that, and continue to play out the patterns of your heritage.  Notice of that what is helpful/useful – and what you might want to change. You can.  This is free will and choice.

The homework for the week was to continue to notice the patterns – and making conscious choices relative to what you see.

Then we wrote – and read – the obituary that might be written for us NOW and most especially we noticed what we wished could have been in there.  And, again – realize that now is the time to address that!  Choices.

Insights from this class:

All of us feel a certain vulnerability at this time of our lives.  If we stay with this – sink deeper into it as an invitation – we can see a way of being that is more honest.  More grounded. More real. More truly present with life and those around us. Be very patient; kind to self.  All we’ve done has worth. Now we can see/appreciate God’s creation more deeply. By being more quiet, we can invite the Divine in – right in and through us while still on earth.

Paradoxically, while feeling less able to “do”, we can practice more deeply the doing of the Divine through us. It is the will of the ego that is getting weaker here. Don’t fight this. Let it be. Let it rest. Lean into, open up to, allow the breath of the Divine to penetrate more deeply. As we are less ego driven – more present without resistance – we become part of the Gift of God to the planet.

This is the invitation of this time of our Life

Welcome that! Be curious – Let yourself be supported by the Hand of the Divine.