There is so much conflict in the world right now. So many individuals with ideas of how things should be – with little to no interest, it seems, to hear an alternative narrative. With siloed sources of information and the rallying cries of support for one side only, we become immune to the humanity of those with an opposing view.

Paradoxically, coming to a place in which we can listen to one another requires learning to actually hear ourselves. Not with a harshness – but with a sense of honesty about our own vulnerability. Our own fear of loss – maybe even of our very own selves – as defined by our position. Fundamentally, the remedy to what ails us is to become more self-reflective. More aware of our own inner state. Many tell me they already know all about “mindfulness” – but I don’t see the evidence. It is the application beyond the intellectual understanding that will make a difference here.

This is challenging. Why? Because the racing thoughts of our anxious mind are addictive. Akin to a caffeine fix they can keep us stimulated and feeling alive. To sink back down into the wake of our boat’s movement can be frightening. Immediately the fears that have been chasing us in our pell-mell flight start to careen to the surface. The apparent evidence for our agitation immediately comes back to support our previous state.

Notice, notice – this breath. This moment. Right where you are. This is the difference between knowing about and applying mindfulness. Attending to the inner state can be disruptive. In the pause we discover our own contribution to the malady at hand. Yet, this is the essential first step in healing the addictive disruption of our times. Notice what you bring to the table – the the conversation. Notice the influence of your state of being.

Learning to pause. To stop. To take in the environment both around us and within us in any given circumstance is the prerequisite to make long-lasting and necessary change. We must know the actual circumstance with the precision of accuracy to know the actual proper next step in any situation. And to recognize our own self in all of this.

Let go of the idea of mindfulness as something you already know. Practice, practice.